


Stuck on replay

by coralinejones



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Adrian is a good friend, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Coming Out, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Eddie and Richie get stuck in a time loop basically, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pennywise is mentioned but that bitch isnt gonna be here dont worry, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Sharing a Bed, Soulmates, Time Loop, im gonna add more tags with new chapters, reddie centric but all losers are in this dw, should have minimal to no angst, they're both around 20/21 in this btw, they're both dumb and in love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:20:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26112544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coralinejones/pseuds/coralinejones
Summary: “I mean, I wasn’t. Jealous.”“And now?”“W—what?”“Are you jealous now, Eds?” Richie asked, full on grinning at this point, looking so fucking happy that Eddie swore he could cry just from the sight of him.---Richie and Eddie get stuck in a time loop together and have to figure out how to get out. But they're both dumb, in love with each other and bad at expressing their feelings. Suddenly having all the time in the world could make it harder for them to keep their mutual feelings for each other buried so deep down, though.
Relationships: Adrian Mellon & Richie Tozier, Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Bill Denbrough & Eddie Kaspbrak, Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Mike Hanlon & Richie Tozier, Richie Tozier & Stanley Uris
Comments: 31
Kudos: 64





	1. Realization, panic and love

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii ! :)
> 
> wow, so after years i'm finally back with a reddie fic!! yayyyyyyy
> 
> i watched palm springs a few days back and it really gave me the well needed motivation to finish this and finally post it. it's not really inspired by the film, though, it's more like that i find the time loop thingy super cool and wanted to use it in a reddie fic lol. so no need to know the plot of the film or anything.
> 
> i hope you enjoy this, if you do PLEASE leave a comment, it motivates me to write more and makes my day <3 thank youuuu, also a huge apology if the way i wrote bill's dialogue looks weird lol, i didnt really know how to write it. it's been too long since i've written a fic, but there's more chapters on the way, so hopefully i'll get used to it again :)
> 
> have a beautiful day! :) <3

“Rich?” a voice asked out of nowhere.

No reply.

“Richie, are you even listening to me?”

Richie refocused his eyes on the grass in front of him, blinking a few times to get rid of his blurred vision. Did he forget his glasses? He touched his face but his fingers bumped into thick plastic. Okay, so his glasses were thankfully not lost.

He looked around, immediately noticing the tall trees all around him, all of them so full of tiny green leaves that were peacefully moving along with the cold breeze. His gaze traveled lower from the sky and trees, landing on a small lake that offered him a breathtaking sight in the form of a sunrise reflecting off of the water surface.

Richie quickly realized that he had no idea how he got to this place.

The last thing he did was– Oh, he couldn't remember that either, no matter how hard he tried, his head feeling all foggy and his brain refusing to cooperate.

“I told you not to go if you’re only gonna end up sleeping on me again,” the same voice, now definitely annoyed, stated as if it was a well-known universal fact that when Richie Tozier is tired you definitely should not expect anything from him.

Richie turned his head towards the voice, his eyes landing on his best friend Stanley’s frowning face.

Richie had never felt more confused in his life. He obviously recognized his childhood best friend, but everything would be much better and less confusing if he knew where the hell he was at currently.

“W-what?” Richie said. What a reply!

Stan just rolled his eyes and raised a pair of shiny binoculars from his lap back to his face,continuing his favorite morning activity.

Oh, binoculars!

Something in Richie’s brain clicked back into place, as if he tapped on a switch and turned on a lightbulb. Or something equally as metaphorical.

He looked around once again, now recognizing the park where he was currently sitting on a bench next to Stan.

It was their university campus. Of course.

Richie mentally slapped himself for not realizing sooner.

Was he high? It wasn’t completely off the table and it would definitely explain a lot.

He contemplated that being a possibility but shook his head quickly. No, he didn’t remember getting high or drunk or anything like that. Which made his current situation even more confusing, because zoning out this badly didn’t make any sense.

But even with this new piece of information about the campus park, something still felt off to Richie. How did he get here? Was he really as tired as Stan suggested? Was it even possible to not remember something like that?

Richie involuntarily yawned and yeah, okay, maybe he was just too tired for birdwatching. As much as he loved Stan, birdwatching was the most boring activity he'd ever experienced in his life.

Rubbing his eyes slowly, Richie decided to just not give a fuck about all the alarming questions forming in his brain and threatening to violently push on a big ‘ _PANIC!_ ’ button in his brain that would just get him into a panic attack, so he accepted his lack of knowledge and lazily watched Stan use his binoculars to get a closer look at birds sitting in trees and flying over the lake, and then quickly looking them up in his bird encyclopedia or whatever that was, Richie couldn’t really tell.

After a few minutes of just watching Stanley and slowly but surely zoning out again, Richie’s phone beeped in the pocket of his pants. Just the possibility of someone texting him or getting literally any notification sounded so interesting in that moment that Richie quickly took his phone out and clicked on the notification which immediately took him to his messages, more specifically to a simple message from Eddie that just said ‘ _can we meet in 5 please?? my room_ ’.

Oh.

Eddie.

It was not like Richie forgot about Eddie, that would be total bullshit since they basically saw each other every single day, especially now that Eddie and Bill moved to the same building on campus as Richie, Stan and Mike.

Richie wouldn’t change anything about that.

Sure, seeing his childhood crush, who also happened to be the love of his life and most likely his soulmate as well, daily was kinda hard and felt like tiny knives stabbing into his heart repeatedly, but Richie decided that being able to see Eddie every day, being his best friend and making him smile with his shitty jokes was worth the pain that he could just simply ignore.

He got really good at ignoring his feelings sometimes.

Richie typed back a quick ‘ _omw_ ’ and turned to Stan with an apologetic smile.

“As much as I love getting bored to death with you, my dearest, I gotta blast. Eds texted, his mother’s bed is cold without me and I gotta fix that.”

Stan rolled his eyes so hard that Richie worried for a moment they’d roll into his head.

Yeah, so what if his jokes got shittier with each passing year, it was not like he would stop saying them whenever he got the chance, he just simply didn’t give a fuck.

“Just say you two can’t go without each other even for a minute and leave, God, it’s not that hard, Richard.” Stan deadpanned.

“Oh, so it’s Richard now? Talking shit about birdwatching wasn't a good decision then, noted.”

Stan just shook his head, a small smile tugging at his lips, as he waved his hand dismissively. “If you spend so much time around each other, can you at least finally get your shit together, please? All of us are tired of you two constantly flirting and making heart eyes at each other, it’s annoying.”

Richie nervously chuckled, rubbing his neck and looking anywhere that wasn't his friend’s death stare.

“What a lame joke, Stanny. Do better next time.” And with that he quickly stood up, turned around on his heel and started power walking towards his dorms, leaving a smiling Stan behind.

Richie abruptly stopped in front of Eddie’s door less than five minutes later, almost slamming into them in full force, out of breath from running all the way from the park and across campus.

He also somehow managed to run into Bill at the entrance to the building, exchanging a quick “ _Hi_ ” as Bill was on his way to the library to borrow some books for his afternoon seminar.

After taking a few deep breaths with his hands resting on his knees and his body hunched over, Richie knocked on the door, immediately hearing Eddie’s fast footsteps getting closer and closer until the door swung open, a disheveled Eddie standing behind them.

“Don’t tell me you ran all the fucking way from the park,” Eddie stated, arms crossed across his chest, eyebrows raised and nervous eyes practically scanning the sweaty boy in front of him.

“Couldn’t leave you waiting too long after you sounded so eager in your message, my love.” Richie tried to joke but it fell really flat, both because of him being out of breath, and also because Eddie looked stressed out of his mind and clearly wasn’t in the mood for any of Richie’s stupid jokes and nicknames.

Richie felt his cheeks getting hotter by the seconds and rubbed the back of his neck nervously, waiting for literally any word from Eddie.

“Okay, so based on that uncharacteristically lame-ass joke, you’re also feeling weird today, right?”

“Wait, Eds, was this a compliment? Does that mean my jokes aren’t lame most of the time?” Richie asked, covering his mouth in faked shock and pretending to swoon.

Eddie just rolled his eyes at Richie’s reply, grabbed his arm and pulled him inside his room before kicking the door closed behind them with his foot.

“Stop being like this, asshole. This is serious!”

Richie stood in the middle of Eddie’s room and finally had the time to fully take in his friend’s appearance. Eddie looked scared, he really did. His eyes were all big and full of fear, his shoulders slouched and his fingers trembling slightly. Which made Richie sober up pretty quickly, hands automatically moving forward and resting on Eddie’s shoulders, all protective and soothing.

“Eds, what’s wrong?”

Both of their breaths hitched in surprise when Eddie closed the already non-existing distance between them and wrapped his arms around Richie’s waist, face resting against his chest, giving him one of the biggest hugs in his life.

It wasn’t really news that Eddie Kaspbrak gave one of the best hugs in the world, Bev always said so.

Richie wrapped his arms around Eddie’s shoulders and rested his chin on the top of his head.

“You wanna talk about it?” he mumbled quietly after a few seconds.

He felt Eddie nod his head against his chest before pulling away from his embrace and sitting down on the edge of his bed, taking a deep breath and looking up right at Richie with worried eyes.

“I’m pretty sure the fucking clown is back.”

Okay, yeah, that hit Richie like a brick. That was the last thing he would expect anyone to say ever again.

“By _clown_ you mean…”

At that Eddie stood up, gesturing his arms around angrily while replying. “How many fucking clowns do you know, Rich? Of course it’s Pennywise, who else would it be? Fucking Ronald McDonald?!”

Richie chuckled at that, quickly covering his mouth the second Eddie gave him the type of stare which Richie called the “ _one more joke and I’ll personally strangle you, Trashmouth_ ”.

“Did you— did you see him?” Richie tried again.

“No, but I— I don’t know, I have this really weird feeling, Rich. Ever since I woke up today everything felt so…”

“Blurry?” Richie offered.

Eddie nodded quickly, deep in thought. “Exactly, as if I wasn’t actually awake, you know? As if I was still dreaming.”

They were both quiet for a few seconds before Richie chuckled again. “That’s some Inception type of shit, dude. Might as well keep an eye out for DiCaprio appearing out of nowhere and trying to steal our thoughts or whatever.”

Eddie sighed dramatically, but Richie could see the smile on his face he tried so hard to hide. Victory! At least one joke finally landed.

“You know that’s not the actual plot, right? They’re not stealing fucking thoughts, dumbass.” Eddie replied, sitting back on his bed and smiling up at Richie.

“You’re so cute when you get all bossy on me, Spaghetti.” Richie grinned and leaned against the wall.

“Aww, that reminded me of your sister, Rich. She did really like it when I got all bossy on her last night.”

Richie stared at Eddie for a longer second, taken aback, before erupting in obnoxious laughter, tears almost streaming out of his eyes.

“No fucking way, Eds. You actually tried and got me back this time.”

Eddie tried not to look too proud of himself for making Richie laugh, but he could also feel his cheeks getting all hot now and knew that hiding his proud smile would be impossible.

Richie kept laughing for another long minute before sitting down onto the bed next to Eddie, giving him an awkward high five and offering a big smile.

“So, should we tell the others? Or just like hope this actually isn’t Pennywise messing with us.”

Eddie shrugged. “I don’t wanna bother them, they shouldn’t have to be reminded of that fucking clown again whenever I panic about something. Most of them are most likely in class right now anyway, so they’re safe.”

Richie nodded, falling onto his back on the neatly made bed, staring at the ceiling. He thought about Stanley for a moment, whether he was safe in case Eddie was right all along and the clown was indeed back. Then he remembered Stanley saying something about a literature seminar he was attending with Ben, so he relaxed slightly and closed his eyes, clearing his head of any thoughts.

He felt the mattress dip deeper next to him as Eddie lay down by his side, their legs hanging off of the edge of the bed.

“Richie?”

Richie hummed instead of offering an actual reply, his eyes still closed.

“You have any classes today?” Eddie asked softly, his head tilted to the side, eyes focused on Richie’s rising and falling chest with each slow breath he took.

He looked so peaceful. So beautiful in the sunlight leaking into the room through a small window on a wall across the bed.

Eddie wished he could take a photo of him, frame it and point at it whenever Richie felt self conscious about the way he looked, as if the framed photo could talk and say ' _See? Stop calling yourself ugly, you dummy. You’re the most beautiful person in the world._ ’ Okay, Eddie could admit to himself that those would be his words and that they were extremely corny. But the point still stood, even if it made him involuntarily blush.

Feeling Eddie’s stare on him, Richie opened his eyes and tilted his head towards him, grinning again. “Nope, no classes today. You?”

Eddie shook his head, eyes locked with Richie’s, a warm smile ever-present on his face.

One thing Eddie realized some time ago was that he smiled a lot whenever he was spending time with Richie. He had no idea how come he never realized sooner since it was so obvious, but sometimes his face almost hurt from how much he smiled.

Sure, he’d never admit to Richie that he actually enjoyed his stupid jokes and loved his annoying nicknames, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t the absolute truth. Richie just made him very happy, ever since the day they became best, and absolutely inseparable, friends in elementary school. Nothing managed to stop them from spending as much time together as possible, not even Sonia Kaspbrak and definitely not an ugly clown from some space hell.

Richie looked away quickly after holding Eddie’s gaze for too long, a light blush dusting his cheeks and tips of his ears, staring at the ceiling again.

“So, uh… We could maybe spend the day together and wait for another weird thing to happen? To make sure it’s not the clown fucking with us again?”

Eddie agreed to Richie’s plan way too quickly and enthusiastically for his own liking. Whatever, blame him for wanting to spend every second with Richie.

The truth was that they hadn’t really hung out properly in at least a month because of never-ending classes and Richie’s short and failed part-time job phase.

Sure, Eddie and Bill would meet up with Stan, Mike and Richie and hang out either outside or inside their dorm rooms, but it wasn’t the same as hanging out _only_ with Richie. It felt more personal and Richie’s jokes felt targeted more towards the goal of making Eddie laugh to the point of happy tears, rather than making Stan roll his eyes and Bill and Mike sigh in frustration.

Richie sat up on the bed, looking down at Eddie, and flicked him on his forehead playfully, a big smile on his face showcasing his shiny teeth. “What’s going on in that head of yours, Mr. Kaspbrak?”

Eddie scrunched his nose and slapped Richie’s hand away from his face. “Never call me that again, God.”

Richie opened his mouth, ready to let out some absolutely awful and definitely not funny joke about Eddie calling him a god, but Eddie was quicker, his hand already clasped on Richie’s mouth.

“Don’t you fucking dare make that into another joke.”

Richie probably heard only half of that sentence, because he was already on his back, dying of laughter and leaving Eddie confused.

“What the hell is wrong with you today. I’m gonna fucking call Stan to babysit your ass, this is unbelievable.” He stated, shaking his head disappointingly.

Richie was still laughing when he turned face to face with Eddie, his glasses all weird on his face, dark curls messily all over the place on his forehead and eyes all shiny from pure happiness.

“You love it, Eds.”

And yeah, fuck, he did.

He _really_ did.

He loved seeing Richie this happy and relaxed in his presence. He loved the way Richie could make him laugh like no one else could, and how he had the same effect on Richie, making him laugh so easily, so naturally. He loved how Richie understood him, how he knew when to get serious.

He loved Richie. It was _so_ simple, he loved him with his whole heart.

A comfortable silence settled between them, their eyes locked, lazy smiles on both their faces and their cheeks tinted pink. Eddie swore he could see Richie’s eyes flick to his mouth for a millisecond, but before he could react in any way, Richie yawned loudly, covering his mouth with his hand.

“When did you even get to bed last night, Rich? I got a text from Bev at like 3am.”

Richie chuckled, staring at the ceiling again. “Yeah, she left at 3 and I stayed at Adrian’s overnight, actually. I think I fell asleep around five.”

Eddie pushed the jealousy down at the notion of Adrian’s name.

“Oh.”

“Adrian just recently got a Switch with the new Mario Kart, so we played that for a few hours and kinda lost track of time.” Richie chuckled again, smiling fondly at the memory of the previous night.

The Losers met Adrian at the start of their first semester at the university. Or it was more like Ben met Adrian though their Literature seminar where they happened to be paired up for a project that took them around twenty coffee meetings to finish, Bev occasionally joining them by Ben’s side and hanging out with Adrian after, chatting after a quick smoke. After that they introduced Adrian to the remaining Losers, inviting him to hang out with them whenever he had some free time.

Eddie liked Adrian, he was really friendly and always managed to tell the most intriguing stories, at least according to Bill who would sometimes discuss his newest story ideas with him for their shared Creative Writing seminar.

Sometimes, though, Eddie also noticed Adrian’s longing stares aimed at Richie. They brought out a jealous side of Eddie that he himself didn’t like at all. In those moments Eddie kept reminding himself that Richie was simply his best friend, not his boyfriend in any way, and if Adrian had the courage to ask Richie out then that was their business and him getting all jealous was highly unfair and rude towards both his friends.

Yeah, it was easy to tell that to himself whenever he caught Adrian staring at Richie with that dumb smile, but it was way harder to tell that to his freaking heart. And he hated it.

Richie suddenly raised his eyebrows in some sort of an unspoken understanding laced with slight teasing, propped on his elbow and turned towards Eddie with a playful smirk on his face.

“What? You jealous, Eds?”

Eddie knew it was a lost cause at this point, because he could very much feel his cheeks heating up at the question, but he still furrowed his brows going for a defensive look on his face, sitting up quickly and crossing his arms over his chest.

“Jealous of who?” He tried to dig himself out of that hole of embarrassment and his unresolved feelings.

Richie was sitting up now as well, his legs crossed, that damn playful smirk still present on his face. Eddie was pretty sure that Richie knew very well what he was currently doing by starting this conversation. That fucker.

“Don’t act dumb, Spaghetti.” Richie replied, no bite behind his words as he now smiled back at Eddie, his eyes kind but that mischievous glint in them still very much alive.

Eddie shook his head, looking anywhere that wasn’t Richie’s face.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Yeah, so… he was fucked.

There was no way for him to get out of this whole conversation, at least not without spilling out his true hidden feelings, especially now when he started getting his fucking hopes up as well, knowing well enough his stupid brain would most likely make him say something he could regret super soon, just because Richie’s smile and stare was making his heart flutter, as if his chest was full of butterflies.

They were both silent for a few seconds, the anticipation heavy in the air between them, before Richie broke it with his voice, so uncharacteristically quiet that Eddie almost didn't hear him.

“You don’t have to be jealous of Adrian.”

Eddie’s eyes shot up at that, meeting Richie’s kind ones.

“I mean, if that’s the case, Eds.” Richie quickly added, not trying to assume what Eddie might had been thinking or feeling.

Eddie knew he wouldn’t be able to look away from Richie’s gaze even if he tried, he felt like he could drown in Richie’s eyes and he welcomed that possibility with open arms.

“Oh, I don’t?” Eyes still locked, Eddie replied, his own voice sounding quiet to his ears and his face feeling warmer than he’d like.

And was that a playful tone? Was he— was he flirting with Richie?

He could swear he saw Richie’s pupils get slightly dilated when he spoke.

 _Fuck_.

This could end so badly.

Abort mission. Abort the motherfucking mission!

“I mean, I wasn’t. Jealous.”

“And now?”

“W—what?”

“Are you jealous now, Eds?” Richie asked, full on grinning at this point, looking so fucking happy that Eddie swore he could cry just from the sight of him.

He felt the soft tips of Richie’s fingers slowly and carefully touch his, going over them, lacing them together. Eddie looked down at their joined hands, then back up at Richie who was watching him intently, smiling.

“Don’t call me that. So what if I am?” The words left Eddie’s mouth before he even had the chance to think them over, think over their impact, what they could cause.

“I can help with that. As long as you want me to, Eddie.” Richie knew he was pushing his luck and it could all backfire, but he also knew this was the bravest he’d ever been in his life and he didn’t want to stop.

Eddie could hear his heart beating in his chest, pulsing in his neck. “Depends on what you have in mind.”

At this point he was almost acting on auto-pilot; as if all along deep down he knew what he wanted so badly, knew what he felt and how he felt towards Richie, as if his own body and mind knew how to proceed in a situation like this.

As if his feelings, all the love in his heart that was overflowing, was so strong and so natural to him that he didn’t even need to think, already knowing what to do.

As if this wasn’t the first time he found himself in this exact situation, and because of that he knew what the right thing to do next was.

Richie started leaning towards him, placing his hand softly onto Eddie’s knee for support, Eddie’s hands automatically coming up as well, placed on Richie’s shoulder and cheek.

They were _so_ close, both their eyes closing, anticipation heavy in the air, their hearts beating out of their chests… and then the door opened with a loud thud.

Eddie and Richie backed up on the bed as far from each other as possible, Richie nearly falling onto the floor in the process, both of them red in the face, their eyes landing of Bill who was balancing a big stack of books in his arms.

Richie sighed. Of course something like this always had to happen whenever he tried to confess his feelings. Of fucking course.

Eddie glanced at Richie, relieved that Richie looked as bummed out and embarrassed about the whole thing as he did.

All that bravery he felt just a few seconds ago? All fucking gone. Thanks a lot Bill.

“H-hey, guys. S-sorry about k-kicking the d-door like t-that.” Bill apologized, walking into the room and kicking the door behind him again to close them this time, completely oblivious to the whole situation he just so rudely interrupted. After that he placed the pile of books onto the floor of his part of the room, sitting down onto his bed.

“S-so, w-what are you t-two up t-to?” Bill asked, smiling at them.

Richie stood up the second Bill spoke, offering Eddie a quick apologetic smile and taking a few steps backwards towards the door leading out of the room. “Uhhh, actually, I’m gonna go back to my room and get some sleep.”

Bill raised both his eyebrows, visibly surprised. “It’s t-ten in t-the m-morning, R-Richie?”

Richie shrugged, trying to come up with some joke to make it all more believable and less awkward, but failing miserably. “Exactly, I’m tired as fuck because Staniel made me go watch birds with him so… Uhhh, anyway, see you both later.” He gave them a quick peace sign and basically ran out the door.

Arriving in his own dorm room less than five minutes later, Richie shrugged off his sneakers, immediately falling face down onto his bed and groaning into his pillow from annoyance.

Bill ruining the moment like that was so fucking unfortunate and embarrassing to him.

He knew that from now on his and Eddie’s friendship would be all weird because of them almost kissing but he also knew that neither of them would try and make a move again because they were both absolute fucking idiots.

He also knew they’d have to deal with it some day soon, because ignoring it completely was off the table and he knew for a fact that Eddie always took matters into his hands when he got pissed off about something. And this was definitely the case.

Richie sighed deeply, deciding to solve the whole situation by just falling asleep and logging off from the world for a bit - basically ignoring things - because he was good at that. So he snuggled into his soft fleece blanket, turned towards the wall and away from the sunlight streaming into the room through a window, and closed his eyes, eventually falling asleep.

“Rich?”

Richie groaned, annoyed. Who the fuck decided to wake him up, he was just getting such a good sleep and—

“Richie, are you even listening to me?”

Richie opened his eyes so quickly, he could swear the sunlight hitting him so abruptly damaged his eyesight for good.

Wait. Why was he sitting? More importantly, _where_ the fuck was he sitting?

He blinked a few times, his eyes finally adjusting to the direct sunlight shining straight into his face, and then looked around himself and FUCK.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

What the hell was happening.

“I told you not to go if you’re only gonna end up sleeping on me again,” the same voice said, sounding annoyed this time.

Richie turned towards the voice next to him, and when his eyes landed on Stanley he quickly stood up from the bench, turned around and threw up right in front of a big tree in the university campus park.

What the fuck was happening. Why was he back at the park with Stan where he found himself just a few hours ago.

No way. No, nope, no.

“What the fuck, Richie?” Stan asked, the disgust clear in his voice. “Don’t tell me Adrian and Beverly got you drunk again last night because of some stupid game of spin the bottle. We talked about that!”

Richie was holding himself up with his hand placed on the tree, wiping his mouth and trying his hardest not to throw up again. He felt sick and weird and nothing made sense.

Was this some sort of a fucked up nightmare? His personal hell?

He turned around towards Stan, most likely looking so out of it that even Stan seemed worried.

“Maybe you should go back and lie down, Rich. You look like shit.”

“Wow, thanks so much for the kind words, Staniel.” Richie chuckled, but even he could hear how bad his voice sounded, and he prayed to whoever was out there to not get sick again.

Richie was just about to go full on panic mode this time when his phone beeped in his pocket. He took it out, staring at a new message from Eddie.

Thank God. If he wasn’t alone in this, that would be at least a bit comforting in this exact moment.

‘ _my room NOW_ ’ as Richie read the text, he started slowly backing up away from the bench, eventually waving at Stan apologetically, a nervous smile on his face.

“Uh, see you later, Stan the man? I gotta bounce real fast, sorry!” And with that Richie was sprinting to Eddie’s dorm, praying to every fucking god in the endless universe to let him have this bit of comfort in the form of Eddie also experiencing whatever the hell _he_ was experiencing. Because going through this alone made him more scared than he’d ever admit.

Richie almost ran into Bill on the stairwell, exchanging a ‘ _hi_ ' with him so fast, Bill almost stopped to ask what was going on. Thankfully he didn’t do that, because Richie was pretty sure that if he had to explain this whole situation right fucking now to Bill, he’d most likely faint or throw up again, or maybe both.

Richie stopped in front of the door to Eddie’s room, about to knock, when the door swung open with Eddie standing behind it. Richie was about to say something funny real fast, but Eddie was quicker by grabbing Richie’s arm and pulling him inside his room, closing the door behind him and starting to pace all around the small room nervously.

“Bill had to help me get through a fucking panic attack just a few minutes ago, Rich. What the fuck is happening?! I swear you better tell me you’re also stuck in some fucking _Groundhog Day_ type of bullshit reality or else I’m about to start panicking again for being alone in this and I don’t wanna have to deal with another fucking panic attack, so I—“

Richie quickly grabbed both of Eddie’s hands into his, stopping him from pacing around the room and rambling without a stop in sight. Eddie looked at him, immediately feeling calmer and more grounded under the safety of Richie’s touch.

“I’m so fucking scared, Richie. I don’t think I can deal with _It_ again.”

Eddie’s voice sounded so small and broken. And Richie understood, he really did.

He still had nightmares about that fucking clown from time to time and the mere possibility of it being back scared him to death.

Hearing and seeing Eddie this scared again, the exact same way he was in the house on Neibolt Street a few years back, made Richie want to wrap his arms around Eddie in a protective hug and risk his own safety, and even his own life, just to ensure Eddie would be safe and unharmed.

The thought of failing Eddie again, the way he did back in Neibolt, and having to see him hurt or worse; lying lifeless in front of him at the hands of the clown, terrified him.

But he couldn’t say that out loud, he couldn’t get the worry off his mind by voicing it to someone and allowing them to help him overcome it.

Saying it out loud would make it real.

So Richie did his absolute best to ignore it. Because maybe if he ignored it long enough, it would never ever become real.

Or at least that was what he told himself.

Richie was never good at expressing his feelings, especially the ones hidden deep down.

So instead of letting Eddie know that he was also as scared as him, that he just wanted to live a normal life for once, he just wrapped his arms around Eddie’s shoulders and hugged him, offering him a safe place for at least a few seconds.

“So, we’re stuck in some freaking time loop, huh?” Richie mumbled, chin resting on the top of Eddie’s head.

Eddie chuckled softly, sounding way more relaxed than he did a second ago, tightening his arms around Richie’s waist. “I think so. Bill reacted like I was crazy when I told him, so he’s not stuck with us.”

Richie nodded. “Yeah, neither is Stanley, he acted perfectly normal, as if nothing was wrong.”

They both thought for a bit after that, still holding each other in a comforting hug.

“Rich?”

“Hmm?”

“What if it’s not Pennywise this time? Wouldn’t he mess with all of us? This doesn’t make any sense.”

“I mean, we’d have to ask the others to make sure they’re also not stuck.”

“I have a feeling it’s only the two of us.” Eddie admitted, face resting on Richie’s chest, listening to his heartbeat.

Richie didn’t know how to feel about that possibility.

Was he relieved he wasn’t alone in this mess? Yeah, definitely.

Was he happy about the fact that it meant Eddie was also stuck in whatever this was and would have to deal with it too? Absolutely fucking not.

So, he was currently stuck in a time loop with his best friend, who also happened to be his crush and the person he loved the most in the whole universe, without any end to this in sight.

He was also facing the big probability of having to deal with his feelings in the near future when Eddie inevitably mentions the kiss that never happened, therefore risking Eddie finding out about how he felt towards him.

And to make it even better, all that could result in the end of their friendship.

Yup, that sounded about right when it came to Richie’s luck. Seriously, fuck his life.


	2. Would you make a wish on my love?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiii again everyone! :) thank you so SO much for you lovely comments on the first chapter!! :') they made me so happy and make me smile sm:)
> 
> here's the second chapter yayyy! so sorry for taking my time with this, i had a lot of stuff going on at the end of august and didn't really have time to update, so i decided to write a longer chapter as some kind of an apology haha and that took more time than i expected, BUT now im back and have all the time i need so,, expect the third chapter soon :) i hope you enjoy this and have a beautiful day! <3
> 
> title of this chapter is from a song by fka twigs called 'sad day' btw.
> 
> comments are as always very much appreciated, please let me know what you think of this chapter, thank youuu :)

“Okay, so… What the fuck do we do about this?”

Richie was lying on his back on Eddie’s bed, legs over the blanket and head hanging down the edge of the bed, staring at the room upside down, his glasses slowly sliding down from his face. Eddie sat with his legs crossed on the bed next to Richie, shaking his head in disapproval and waiting until Richie inevitably slips and falls off the bed, a small smile was present on Eddie’s face nevertheless.

“Get up here before you hurt yourself, idiot.”

Richie grinned, successfully getting back onto the bed without managing to fall onto the carpeted floor head first like Eddie so nervously anticipated, immediately crossing his legs, fixing his glasses and offering Eddie a relaxed smile.

“So? How do we get out of this hell of a situation?” Richie repeated his question, elbows propped on his knees and face in his hands.

Eddie shrugged. “Maybe we could tell the others? They could help? You got any better idea?”

“Dude, I’m out of ideas.”

Eddie sighed dramatically falling while falling onto his back on the bed. “What the fuck do you mean out of ideas? You literally haven’t contributed any ideas at all, Richie.”

Richie shrugged, lying down next to him.

The reason why he hadn’t come up with any ideas was because he kept thinking about them almost kissing back in the first round of this time loop hell-like adventure, or whatever he could call it.

He wanted to kiss Eddie so badly back then and he knew very well he actually would if Bill wasn’t in the wrong place at the wrong time in such an unfortunate way.

The problem was that he wasn’t sure whether Eddie actually wanted to kiss him too in that moment or if he was simply looking too much into things and started imagining something that wasn’t there.

Because that was also possible, right?

As much as he wanted to kiss Eddie and tell him all about his repressed feelings for him, about all the suffocating love he feels, he knew that doing so could endanger their friendship and possibly end it forever. And he also knew very well he wouldn’t survive that. He absolutely couldn’t lose Eddie just because of his stupid feelings.

What Richie didn’t know was that right next to him, Eddie was also thinking about the same situation and about his feelings; trying to make some sense of them and figure out what was more important to him and what he was willing to risk.

Was he willing to risk losing his best friend in favor of finally expressing how he felt and letting the love for his friend that he buried so deep down in his chest finally see the light of day?

Was getting an answer to all his late night questions that his brain created with the simple purpose of torturing him worth it even if it meant losing Richie in the process?

Deciding to escape his thoughts for a while, Eddie sat up again, looking down at Richie who was playing with his colorful braided bracelet. “I think the best option we have right now is asking the others for help.”

So that was what they did. Eddie insisted on talking to Stanley again, who was supposedly somewhere with Bill working on their seminar project. Richie quickly decided to not go with Eddie, since seeing Stan’s disappointed face wasn’t exactly something he needed to experience again, especially when it was usually the first thing he saw right after the loop restarted and he woke up on that damn park bench again. So, instead, Richie decided to talk to Beverly, Ben and Mike who were apparently, to his advantage, all hanging out together at the library.

Richie walked inside the building belonging to the university library, taking out his phone a shooting Bev a quick text, getting a reply from her almost immediately.

**To:** Queen of my life

‘where u at’

**From:** Queen of my life

‘second floor back of the room’

**To:** Queen of my life

‘omw <3’

Richie took the stairs two at a time, quickly arriving to the second floor of the library building and heading towards the back of the largest room on the floor.

To his surprise the room was mostly empty, only a few students sitting at the long desks and sleepily turning pages in their borrowed books, occasionally typing something into their phone or computer.

Richie could already see Beverly waving at him all excited with a bright smile on her face from the back of the room, a half-eaten apple in hand and a colorful backpack full of small enamel pins on the floor at her feet.

He could also spot Ben and Mike sitting at a table with a stack of books in front of them and their notebooks open, discussing something most likely school related.

He considered running towards Beverly but then he remembered the scary library lady that yelled at him many times in the past, so he power walked instead, wrapping his arms around Bev and giving her a big hug.

“Bev, my love, how are you doing today?”

Beverly pulled away, smiling back at him happily.

“Couldn’t be doing any better now that my favorite person has arrived.” She announced theatrically, giving Richie a wink.

“Hey, I thought I was your favorite person.” Ben interrupted from the table, a fake pout on his face.

Beverly chuckled, blowing him a kiss. “You _are_ my most favorite person, I thought that was obvious.”

Ben blushed hard and went back to studying the pages in the book in front of him, all happy about her answer.

Bev sat down into a beanbag on the floor, patting the spot next to her and smiling up at Richie with that kind smile of hers.

“So, what’s up?”

Richie sat down next to her, nervously playing with the bracelet on his wrist.

“Uhh, okay, I have a question.”

Beverly took another bite from the apple she was holding, nodding her head. “Yeah?”

Richie fiddled with his bracelet some more before finally deciding to just get it over with.

“Are you, uh, having a weird day today as well? Like, not really normal?”

Beverly looked slightly taken aback by that, her eyebrows knitting together in worry.

“Uh, what do you mean?”

Richie sighed, trying to find the right words to explain it to her better without making her worry too much.

“Like, do you feel weird as if there was something seriously wrong with today?”

Okay, yeah, that didn’t clear up anything. Good job, Richie.

For fuck’s sake.

Beverly’s face got even more serious as she put the apple away and turned more towards Richie, giving him her full attention.

“Wait, is this about your fight with Eddie yesterday?”

Now it was Richie’s turn to be taken aback.

“My what?”

Bev placed her hand on Richie’s knee to give him a sense of comfort and safety.

“Your fight with Eddie. Do you wanna talk about it, Rich? It looked pretty serious, I’ve never seen you fight like that before. Have you talked to Eddie yet? You two being like this isn’t good for you, and you know that.” Bev tried again, carefully choosing the right words, not trying to make Richie more anxious than he already seemed like.

Which backfired real bad the second she dropped so many questions on him.

“What the fuck are you talking about, Bev?” Richie asked, completely oblivious to what she was saying, the most confused he’d even been in his life.

Bev shook her head, not even knowing how to react to that.

She didn’t have to think of a reply either way, because Richie was talking again already.

“I don’t remember having a fight with Eddie? When did that even fucking happen?!”

So much for thinking his day couldn’t get any weirder…

Now even Ben and Mike were staring at Richie from behind their table, rightfully confused.

“You seriously don’t remember, Richie?” Ben asked, his voice kind.

“Eddie was so out of it yesterday after the fight. Bill kept texting us to come over and help him, because Eddie wouldn’t stop crying or talking about it without planning to stop any time soon.” Mike added.

Richie threw his hands up in defeat, looking at his friends like they were making all that up on the spot. “What the actual fuck is happening right now? I legit don’t remember any fights with Eddie from yesterday. Y’all are seriously blaming me for doing something I don’t even remember.”

And then it clicked in his brain.

Oh.

Maybe it had something to do with the whole time loop situation.

“Wait.” He tried to make sense of it. At least a bit.

How could it be possibly connected? Why the fuck couldn’t he remember something as serious as a fight with Eddie. Fuck, _he_ made Eddie cry. That _was_ serious.

Beverly patted his knee softly. “Richie, what’s wrong? You know you can talk to us, we can try to help.”

Richie sighed, rubbing his eyes with his hands under his glasses.

Alright, time to just fucking get it all out right now before this whole situation could get even more confusing and stressful for all of them.

“Okay, don’t freak out, but Eddie and I have been stuck in a time loop ever since this morning.” He blurted out.

There, it wasn’t that hard.

Beverly, Mike and Ben just kept staring back at him with blank expressions, not saying a word.

“I’m not fucking with you, by the way. Just to make that clear.” Richie quickly added.

Mike was the first to talk after a very long an awkward minute of absolute silence. “Uh, are you sure, Richie?”

“Am I sure?! Do you think I’d voluntarily go birdwatching with Stan twice in one day?”

Beverly shrugged. “He has a point, Mike.”

“Wait, so you two are seriously stuck in a time loop?” Ben asked again, making sure he heard that right the first time.

Richie nodded, feeling frustrated as hell.

“Yes, we already restarted the time loop once, so I’m pretty fucking sure that we’re stuck, Haystack.”

Bev frowned. “How did you restart it? Does it restart automatically after midnight? Or did you like accidentally die or something?”

“This isn't Happy Death Day, Bev.” Richie chuckled.

Beverly shrugged, biting into her half-eaten apple again, deep in thought. “Could be, you never know, Rich.”

“So how did you do it then?” Mike asked, trying to get some helpful answers that could guide him towards finding a solution to all of this.

“I, uh, I actually just fell asleep. When I woke up I was back at the start of the loop, at the park with Stan.”

“And Eddie?” Beverly asked.

“How did he get back to the start?” Ben added.

Okay, well… That was a good fucking question.

Richie just now realized that he’d forgotten to ask Eddie about that. Because he knew how he restarted the loop, but he was pretty sure there was no way that Eddie also fell asleep at the same freaking time as him.

“I forgot to ask him, actually.”

All three of the Losers sighed, Beverly throwing the remainder of her apple into the trash bin next to the table.

“You should ask.”

“Thanks, Bev. I would have never thought of that without your help.” Richie replied sarcastically, getting up from the beanbag, ready to just leave.

“Fuck off, Richie. We’re trying to help you here, don’t be mean for no reason.”

“How exactly would _you_ feel, Bev? Huh?! How would you feel if you found out you were somehow stuck in a fucking time loop only a few years after finally leaving Derry and getting away from that fucking clown? Do you have any idea how fucking scary that is?!”

Richie felt tears dangerously threaten to escape his eyes and stream down his cheeks any second and he hated it, he really fucking did.

Bev got up quickly too, wrapping her arms around him carefully, pulling him into a comforting hug. Richie reacted immediately, wrapping his arms around her waist and burying his face into her shoulder, letting some tears escape his eyes.

After a few seconds, he could feel another two pairs of arms wrapping around them, Mike and Ben joining their hug. It felt nice, it reminded Richie that he wasn’t alone and never would be, that he had his friends who were like his family, they _were_ his family; they loved him and cared about him.

Richie laughed into Beverly’s shoulder, but even he could hear how upset his voice sounded. After a few seconds, he started pulling away from the hug slowly, giving his friends the happiest smile he could manage, because he truly did feel so thankful for them and he wanted them to know it.

Bev still held onto Richie’s hand and squeezed it gently, getting his attention again.

“We’re here for you, Richie, okay? I need you to understand this. Whatever is happening or will happen, we’re here. Even if it means we have to kick It’s ass again, alright?”

The smile she gave him was so warm, so kind and full of love that Richie believed. He really _really_ did.

So he nodded, smiling back. “Thanks guys, seriously.”

“No problem, man. We’re here for you.” Mike replied, Ben adding a quick “We love you.”

Richie was smiling so hard his face hurt. He loved them all so much.

But he still had so many questions, so he had to break their comfortable silence and get some answers.

“Okay, so… could anyone please tell me about that fight I had with Eddie yesterday? Because no matter how hard I try, I just fucking can’t remember anything before this morning.”

Bev sat on a chair at the table this time, Richie sitting next to her as Mike and Ben got back to their chairs as well. “You sure you wanna know?”

Richie nodded, adjusting his glasses nervously.

Beverly took a deep breath. “Okay, well… I was hanging out with Adrian at his dorm after lunch. We initially just wanted to talk about some stuff but then he showed me this new cool game he just recently got for his Xbox, so we decided to invite you over to play with us. It’s always more fun with you, since you’re the only person who can beat Adrian in literally any game and seeing his face when you defeat him is the funniest thing.”

Richie grinned. She was right about that, it was the funniest thing ever.

“But you were taking more time than usual, so we got all impatient and just decided to look out the window to check if you were at least close or not… And that’s when we saw you standing near the dorm building with Eddie and you were clearly having an argument,because Eddie was throwing his hands all over the place like he always does. And then uhhhh,” Bev stopped, glancing at Ben and Mike with an unsure look.

“And then what?” Richie demanded.

“And then Eddie kissed you.” Bev replied, waiting for Richie’s reaction to that specific piece of unexpected information.

Richie didn’t think he was even able to speak at this point. He felt a wave of sudden nausea wash over him and he prayed to whichever God was out there not to throw up on the fucking library carpet.

“W-what happened then?” He asked after a long minute, his voice embarrassingly quiet.

“Uh, you both looked like you were about to pass out. Then Eddie started furiously apologizing or something like that, I don’t know what you were saying because I couldn’t really hear you. Then you both started arguing again and then it got pretty serious with Eddie crying and storming off. And, uh, that’s all.”

Richie was about to reply to that, but Beverly quickly cut him off.

“I know what you’re thinking, Rich. It wasn’t your fault, okay?”

Richie frowned at that. “So you’re saying it was Eddie’s fault?”

Beverly sighed. “No. It just looked like you had a disagreement about something, to be honest. It wasn’t anyone’s fault.”

“Don’t worry, Richie. You guys will talk things out, you always do.” Mike offered, a small smile on his face.

“But you said it was worse this time? What if we don’t talk things out? How the fuck are we even supposed to talk about it when I don’t even remember it happening?!” Richie panicked.

“Okay, fair point.” Beverly admitted, sighing again and squeezing Richie’s hand in support.

“Maybe the time loop has something to do with that?” Mike suggested.

They were all quiet for a second, considering Mike’s question, trying to make at least some sense of it, when Ben made an ‘Oh!’ sound - the one you make when you finally remember that one specific thing you kept forgetting throughout the whole day.

“I might have an answer to that, actually.” Ben said, smiling proudly.

Richie’s face lit up at that, as if he just witnessed a miracle. So there was some hope for them getting out from that damn time loop after all. Hanscom for the win!

“Bennifer, if you actually have a solution to this, I’ll give you the biggest kiss ever.” Richie announced, his signature grin back on his face, anxiety slowly but surely leaving his body.

Ben blushed at that, taking a heavy-looking book out of his backpack. “Okay, so I actually stumbled across the topic of time loops a few weeks ago when I was doing research for a project for my Literature seminar. This is all strictly fictional, though.”

Richie chuckled. “Ben, we’ve literally fought a fucking space clown. I don’t think anything is fictional at this point.”

They all laughed before Ben continued. “Well, okay, let’s say it’s not fictional then. From what I understood and remember; I think you and Eddie could have gotten stuck in a time loop specifically and _only_ because of that argument you had.”

Richie scrunched his nose in confusion. “But that makes no sense. We’ve had some arguments before back in high-school, so why didn’t we end up in a time loop back then every time we argued?”

Bev nervously smiled at Richie, before sharing an understanding look with Ben. “Actually, I think it makes sense.”

“Okay, Ben, Beverly, now I’m getting confused too.” Mike admitted, Richie nodding along and supporting him with a quick “Fucking same.”

“Okay, well, this is just my deduction, so don’t take it as the ultimate truth, but I think you and Eddie are actually soulmates, which would be pretty rare but not impossible, since there are some cases of people having them. And then you, uhm, had a fight that was most likely revolving around your feelings and relationship. And it ended up being the worst fight you’ve had, resulting in both of you feeling broken - Eddie crying to Bill and you getting drunk with Beverly and Adrian - and creating the possibility of your friendship ending for good. And if I’m correct about that then the universe decided to fix it by deleting the fight you two had from your memory and getting you both stuck in a time loop, so that you had a chance to fix your relationship.”

They all stared at Ben, Richie’s jaw basically on the floor, unable to even think after hearing so much new information, which on top of everything sounded absolutely wild.

Soulmates?!

Richie felt like passing out, he really fucking did.

He knew he’d have to ask Ben to explain it in more detail eventually, because some of it made no sense to him, but for now he had lot to think about.

He looked around at Beverly and Mike, hoping they’d be as confused as he was, but all he found in his friend’s faces was some kind of an understanding.

How come they understood all of this? The three pairs of eyes belonging to his friends were now all on him, eagerly waiting for his reaction.

“But... why?” Richie finally managed to ask after a minute of complete silence.

Beverly, Mike and Ben all sighed at Richie’s obliviousness, immediately replying with “Because you’re soulmates!” in unison.

Richie tried to take that all in, all this information, he really really tried.

And… it made sense. It sounded absolutely fucking crazy and so out of pocket but it actually made sense.

Holy fucking shit.

His brain was full and buzzing with all these new questions about this revelation.

Should he tell Eddie now? Did Eddie remember the fight they had, the kiss they shared? If yes, did he regret the kiss? Was that the reason why they screamed at each other? Why would the universe, or whoever created this time loop specifically for them, make them forget the fight they had if they were supposed to deal with it and get over it in order to break free from the loop?

His head started to hurt real bad from all the information overload and all he wanted was to just lie down and fall asleep.

Wait.

Fuck.

“You’re all gonna forget this.” Richie realized.

Beverly looked at him, brows knitted together in both worry and confusion. “Forget what?”

“Today. The moment we restart the loop again, you’re all gonna forget this conversation.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck. How were they supposed to make any sense of this if he had to explain the whole situation to his friends every damn time the loop started all over again. There was no way he’d have enough patience for that.

Ben shrugged, as if this wasn’t the biggest and most annoying problem ever. “You can write it all down on some paper and then make us read it.”

Richie shook his head. They’d think he was joking.

The realization, that he and Eddie were truly the only ones capable of solving all this shit, hit him so hard he almost threw up again. Because he knew that in order to even try to solve this, he’d have to tell Eddie about the fight. About the kiss.

Richie started playing with his bracelet on his wrist, trying to calm himself at least a bit. He had to get out of the library and get some fresh air quickly, this whole depressing atmosphere felt suffocating.

“Okay, so… I think I better get going, Eddie’s probably waiting for me.” Richie announced, already standing up and backing away from the table.

“Text us if you need anything, okay? We’re gonna try our best to find more information about the whole soulmate thing, yeah?” Beverly said.

Richie nodded and smiled at her, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes. He knew it was pointless. There was no way they’d manage to find more information before the loop restarts.

“It’s all gonna be okay, Richie.” She added quickly before Richie basically ran out of the library, only offering a quick wave as a goodbye.

Richie knocked on the door to Eddie’s room, hoping he was actually in there, waiting for him after all. And thankfully that was just the case.

Eddie opened the door, visibly calming down the second his eyes met Richie’s, a big smile appearing on his face.

“Hey there, Spaghetti. Missed me?” Richie grinned, ruffling Eddie’s hair when he passed him on his way into the room.

“Beep beep, Richie.” Eddie shot back, closing the door and following Richie towards his bed, sitting down next to him.

“So, have you talked to Bill and Stan yet?” Richie asked, playing with his bracelet.

What if they told Eddie about the fight? Richie didn’t know what he’d say if Eddie brought it up. He wasn’t brave enough to reply with the truth. Or brave enough to even have that conversation with him.

“Yup! I managed to run into Stan just as he was leaving the park to meet up with Bill, so I joined him and talked to them both at once.”

“And?” Richie hesitantly asked.

Eddie shrugged. “I think it’s fair to say they’re not stuck with us. Bill looked at me like I was crazy once I brought up the time loop stuff, Stan thought I was fucking with them.”

“Classic Staniel.” Richie chuckled.

“It took me some time until they believed me. Neither of them knows what to do about the whole situation, though. Oh, and they also don’t think that Pennywise is behind all this, you know, since it’s only affecting the two of us instead of the whole group.” Eddie continued.

Okay, so Eddie didn’t know about the fight. Good.

“What about the others? Did you talk to them?” Eddie asked, smiling at Richie. And fuck. Yup, lying to Eddie when he smiled like that was the hardest thing ever. Richie felt like shit even only for considering telling a lie.

Richie fell down onto his back with a sigh and decided to just look up at the ceiling, so that he wouldn’t have to look at Eddie’s face.

He felt Eddie’s eyes on him, though. And it made him feel terrible and guilty.

“Uh, about that. I texted Bev if we could meet up and she said they all had some last minute assignment shit to do, so uh… I didn’t get a chance to talk to them about it.” Okay, yeah, that was as believable as the jokes he kept making about all the girls he slept with. Fucking amazing job, Richie. You absolute idiot.

“We could try and talk to them tomorrow? Or I mean, when the loop restarts?” Eddie suggested hopefully, clinging to the last hope of Beverly, Mike or Ben having an answer and possibly even a solution to all this.

“I don’t think it’s necessary, if Stanley doesn’t know what to do, then no one else will.” Richie involuntarily cringed at his own words the second they came out his mouth, because even he knew that was total bullshit.

Eddie stared at him for a few seconds, waiting for him to add more to that, or maybe he was waiting for Richie to start laughing and then tell the truth.

But that didn’t happen.

“I think it’s worth a shot.” Eddie eventually opposed, a frown slowly forming on his face.

They were both quiet for a while, Eddie waiting for any kind of answer from Richie and Richie metaphorically fighting off his thoughts that screamed at him to just tell the truth about everything instead of keeping it deep inside his chest where it would eventually eat his heart alive.

Richie mustered up all the courage that was left and decided to be honest at least about one of the things floating around in his brain. “I think we should just ignore it for a while.”

“What the fuck do you mean by that?! How exactly can I ignore this, Richie? Fucking enlighten me.” Eddie shot back, sounding way angrier than he intended to, immediately feeling guilty for shouting at Richie just because he felt frustrated. Richie didn’t deserve that.

Richie sat up, raising his hands in surrender, palms facing Eddie, trying to de-escalate the situation before it could get any worse and he would accidentally end up word vomiting his feelings all over Eddie.

“Okay, let me explain.”

Eddie nodded, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands, sighing deeply.

“I’m sorry for being such a dick to you, Rich. I’m just… it’s just too much, you know? I thought we left all this fucked up shit behind us in Derry.” Eddie admitted, the exhaustion clear in his voice.

“Yeah, me too, Eds. But I mean… we could use this to our advantage.” Richie tried again, resting his hand on Eddie’s for support, to show that he wasn’t alone in this mess.

“How?”

“I say we just ignore it. At least for a few days. This fucking time loop doesn’t have to be a bad thing, you know?” Richie smiled softly, squeezing Eddie’s hand just for a fraction of a second.

As an immediate reaction Eddie’s warm brown eyes locked with Richie's blue ones, as if he was searching for some sort of certainty that Richie truly believed this was a good idea, that he should trust him.

But Eddie knew very well that even if he hadn’t seen any glimpse of assurance, even if he knew the proposed plan was the most dangerous shit ever, he’d still do it, he’d do anything Richie came up with.

As long as they did it together.

That was how he got through anything that fucking clown had in store for them all those years back; holding Richie’s hand. _Together_.

It made him feel invincible, as if nothing in the universe had enough power to tear them apart from each other. As if what they had, the friendship between them, was the strongest bond ever created.

Eddie’s mind sometimes decided to casually offer the word ‘soulmates' to him, whenever he was thinking about Richie and all the things they’d been through together, all their happy moments, even the sad ones.

That word had managed countless times to either make his heart flutter in pure happiness or make him feel so anxious he would spend many sleepless nights fantasizing about such possibility and what it’d mean to their friendship.

Of course he wished and prayed Richie were his soulmate. But what if Richie had a different opinion? A negative one.

That was usually when Eddie decided to not think about it more, since it only caused him distress.

But such a strong word also offered so many possibilities. Your best friend being your soulmate, someone you’d love forever and spend your time with, someone you’d understand on such a deep level, someone you’d spend the rest of your life with.

And it made Eddie feel so in love. All that love filled up his heart until it overflowed and then slowly enveloped his body, his entire being. He could drown in all the love he felt, he wanted to.

Fantasizing about it was dangerous, it could potentially end their friendship, but Eddie couldn’t stop. Because he had so much adoration for Richie, he loved him so much, everything about him, even his stupid voices and nicknames and shitty jokes.

But after all, Richie became his friend first, and that friendship meant more than anything to him as well, so there was no way he’d ever endanger that. Even if it meant keeping his feelings deep down in his chest and never speaking them into existence, never admitting to feeling the way he did.

“So we just ignore it, live the same day over and over again, until we get tired of it and _then_ we start dealing with it?” Eddie asked, hoping he understood Richie’s proposition clearly.

Richie smiled and nodded eagerly. “Exactly! Think about it, Spaghetti. We rarely get this much free time nowadays. This time loop means we have all the time in the world now, why not take advantage of that? We could go on road trips, fly to different countries, try new things. Then the loop restarts and we’re gonna be back here without actually spending any money. I mean, this is the fucking dream, Eds!”

Richie sounded so happy, so excited to do all of it, that Eddie could never say ‘no’ to that. It sounded risky, and the whole existence of the loop made him pretty anxious in the first place, but even with that fact on the table, he actually liked Richie’s plan.

Having fun without any serious consequences? Of course Richie would think of that as the best possible thing to do.

Richie was waiting for Eddie’s reaction, playing with his bracelet nervously, hoping he’d agree. It sounded like so much fun to Richie and he couldn’t imagine doing it with anyone else.

So when Eddie’s face lit up with that bright smile of his, Richie’s heart started beating so fast he swore he’d just drop dead right there and then, holding the hand of the love of his life. What a way to go that’d be, huh?!

“You know what? Fuck yeah! Let’s do this! I think we earned this after defeating a literal clown from hell.”

Richie laughed, pulling Eddie towards his chest and into a warm hug.

He was right, they deserved this. They would deal with the loop later, but now… Now they had all the time in the world to do any stupid shit they could come up with.

_Together_. Richie and Eddie. Eddie and Richie.

They ended up lying on Eddie’s bed next to each other with their sides pressed together, deciding to watch some random shitty sitcom that came up on the TV that was dangerously placed on the edge of a small coffee table across from Eddie’s bed.

The comfort they both felt while being this close to each other felt like heaven, the comfortable silence between them filling their hearts as they were beating together in a steady calming rhythm.

As if their souls were connected, as if they were two halves that belonged together no matter where or when they existed.

Happily snuggled into Eddie’s side, eyes slowly closing as sleep took over his body, Richie unfortunately completely missed the quiet sound of his phone notifying him of a new message.

A message from Ben.

**From:** Benjamin <3

‘Hey, Richie. I did some research about soulmates and time loops specifically created for soulmates and I found some really important details that I think you should know about. Please call me or text Beverly, we’re still at the library.’


	3. baby, every day is okay with you in my life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiii again everyone! :) once again, so sorry for taking so long with this update, i lost a bit of motivation and creativity for a few days but now it's allll back haha, so here's a longer chapter as some sort of an apology for taking so long :) 
> 
> also thank you so so much for all your lovely comments, they mean so much to me and i'm super grateful for them!! thank you SO much for reading, it means the world to me <3
> 
> i hope you enjoy this chapter, if you do please leave a comment or kudos and i'll see you with the next one :) hope everyone is having a beautiful day and staying safe and healthy! :))
> 
> also just in case - tw: mentions of death (nothing too serious imo, i hope)

“Rich?” a voice asked. Stanley.

Richie was getting used to this whole time loop thing. The confusion and sudden anxietythat always overwhelmed him whenever he woke up back at the park with Stan didn’t affect him this time, instead he felt somewhat calm and maybe even excited? Which maybe wasn’t the best thing, because getting used to the time loop seemed like a bad idea. The last thing Richie wanted was to end up forever stuck in this mess just because he forgot what real life, where different days of the week exist, was like.

Richie quickly realized that the reason why he was actually looking forward to another round of this purgatory-like reality was because he got to spend it with Eddie.

They had as much time as they wished now and just the thought of going on multiple adventures with Eddie and doing some crazy but funny shit with him seriously sounded like the best time ever.

Richie already started creating a list of ‘super awesome stuff-to-do’ in his head, so that when he met up with Eddie he’d already have a fun plan for the day.

One of the many days.

And fuck, here comes the guilt. Of course.

Richie felt bad about the whole situation. Because lying to Eddie in the first place was hard as fuck and made him feel like a complete piece of shit, but now planning to spend so much time with Eddie felt as if he was somehow controlling Eddie, as if he was keeping him in the loop against his will by not telling him the complete truth. Or at least not telling him about the fact that he maybe knew how to escape from this whole mess of a situation.

What if Eddie hated him forever when he'd inevitably find out?

“Richie, are you even listening to me?”

Oh, right. He should probably talk to Stanley, he knew Stan never held back if he got annoyed and he’d most likely just end up decking Richie with his binoculars.

Richie thought it’d be well deserved, though. The image of Stan smacking him with his shiny binoculars for watching birds made him chuckle.

“I told you not to go if you’re only gonna end up sleeping on me again,” Stan continued, annoyed.

Richie gave him a big grin and shot him a quick peace sign. “Actually, gotta blast, Stanny. Sorry about ditching you like this, I’ll make it up to you, promise.” He winked at Stan and then he was already running towards Eddie’s dorm, not even waiting around long enough to hear Stanley’s reply or see his reaction to that obnoxious apology he just delivered.

On his way to Eddie’s place, Richie stopped near the campus coffee shop to catch his breath from running, because dang! Running just really wasn’t his thing. The other reason for stopping there was to buy two coffees - for himself and for Eddie - to start the day off right.

He ordered two overly sweet drinks and decided to check his messages while he was waiting for the coffees to be made.

No new messages. Huh. Alright.

Richie decided to send Eddie a quick text, to let him know he was on his way.

**To:** Eddie my love

‘omw got u coffee 😉’

Richie stared at his phone, waiting for Eddie to reply, or at least view the message.

Two minutes passed and nothing. Weird.

Eddie was usually the first one to text him and definitely the fastest one to reply.

Richie was about to text him again when the barista called out his name. He picked up both the drinks, walked out of the coffee shop and continued his way to Eddie’s dorm, hoping Eddie was actually there.

On the way up the stairwell to Eddie’s room, Richie bumped into Bill again.

“Careful, don’t wanna fall down the stairs, Billiam. The library literally just opened, no need to run.”

Bill frowned. “H-how do you k-know that I’m g-going t-to the library, R-Richie?”

Oh, shit. Okay so maybe it was time for Richie to start taking this a tiny bit seriously before he'd eventually manage to convince all his friends that he'd completely lost it after accidentally predicting the future or some other weird shit.

Richie tried to play it cool, so he grinned and playfully hit Bill’s shoulder.

“Turns out I’m like professor X, mind communication babey!”

Bill chuckled at that. Yes, victory! Richie was just too good at getting out of uncomfortable situations by using his shitty jokes, thank God.

“I-If you’re on y-your way to m-meet Eddie then h-he just l-left.” Bill continued, shrugging. Huh. So that explained why he didn’t reply to Richie’s messages. Kind of.

Where the fuck was he? Didn’t they plan to meet up and spend the day together? Did Richie misunderstand something?

Richie most likely looked like a kicked puppy or something as equally upset, because Bill patted him on the shoulder to somehow offer some comfort.

“T-try calling h-him.” Bill suggested and then he was running down the stairs again, on his way to the library to most likely meet up with Stan, leaving Richie with his two overly sweet coffees standing on the stairs alone.

Richie ended up slowly walking around the campus, one of the two coffees already empty, the second one half-full in his hand. So what? He needed some energy. This time loop shit was exhausting. His mind was buzzing with hundreds of thoughts revolving around Eddie. First of all; Where the fuck was he? Second of all; What the fuck? Why would he just disappear like this without letting Richie know, since they already had a plan for today that Richie counted on.

Lost deep in his messily annoying and persistent thoughts, Richie almost didn’t notice Adrian walking towards him enthusiastically, already waving at him with a big cheerful grin on his face.

“If this isn’t the one and only Mario Kart champion!” Adrian shouted, so Richie could hear him from the distance they still had between each other.

Richie laughed at that, rubbing his neck from embarrassment, his face slowly heating up and tinting red. Ugh, he hated when he just started blushing out of nowhere. His own face would always betray him.

Adrian finally stopped in front of him, pulling him into a quick friendly hug, a big smile present on his face.

“How you holding up, Richie?” Adrian asked before Richie even had a chance to say some funny joke to seem less embarrassed by Adrian publicly praising his gaming skills like that. Sure, he liked attention, but not today.

Adrian still had that friendly smile on his face but his eyes were holding a somewhat concerned expression somewhere deep down.

Richie liked Adrian a lot. He was an amazing friend. Richie could always count on him with anything. He also almost always joined in when it came to making stupid jokes with Richie, the only difference being that Adrian’s jokes were actually pretty smart, and he also cared about his friends the most and really listened whenever they felt troubled by something personal and needed to talk.Adrian also helped Richie a lot when it came to accepting himself and his sexuality, and especially whenever Richie just couldn’t take it anymore and had to vent to someone about his big crush on Eddie. Adrian understood. And Richie was forever thankful for being able to call him one of his best friends.

Sure, there was also that one time they tried to date back in the first year of university, just when Richie had known Adrian for exactly two months. It lasted for less than five days. It was during the time when Richie felt like his chances with Eddie were just absolutely nonexistent and he was just hurting himself too much by all the yearning and hoping that maybe one day he could have a chance to express his feelings. So naturally, he decided that maybe it was time to move on. And so he started - or maybe tried is the better word - dating Adrian, who admitted to liking him back ever since the day they met. And honestly? It wasn’t the worst thing ever, they had a great friendship as a foundation for the relationship, they were both actually attracted to each other and shared some interests, so it was never awkward or uncomfortable whenever they hung out.And sure, Richie liked kissing him and holding his hand when they watched some dumb movie together at Adrian’s place, but then when it came to the actual deep feelings that were important in every relationship? Richie didn’t have them. He did try, but he just couldn’t feel them.It took only less than a week before they both quickly realized that it just wasn’t working, it all felt forced and they honestly preferred being good friends rather than boyfriends. It just didn’t feel right.Both of them thankfully felt the same, Adrian agreeing that the relationship was just another one of their really dumb ideas. Richie couldn’t agree more.

And ever since then, their friendship grew even stronger. They’d hang out more, they’d talk about everything with such ease, it just felt like they got over that one awkward phase in every friendship by making that dumb decision to start dating, so now there wasn’t anything that could be more awkward than that and it made them both feel comfortable and at ease around each other. And Richie was really grateful.He knew that not everyone would be so chill about it as Adrian was. As he said, he was just a really incredible friend, and Richie was glad to have him.

“Uh, what do you mean?” Richie asked, knowing very well what he meant by that question.

Adrian had an understanding look in his eyes. “Your fight with Eddie, obviously. Everything okay in paradise? Did you two talk it out?”

Richie nervously looked down at his sneakers, not really wanting to keep the eye contact between them. He felt stupid for not being able to deal with this whole situation normally without making an idiot out of himself, but after all - it were his fucking feelings and stupid big crush on Eddie they were talking about here. Of course he’d get nervous.

“Uh- not yet, nope.” He quickly replied, his eyes flicking up to see Adrian’s reaction.

“Aw, I’m sorry. I’m sure it’s gonna be okay, though. There’s no way you two could stay mad at each other for more than a day.”

And yeah, while Adrian was most likely right about that, as he was right about every damn thing ever, Richie just couldn’t fully believe it.

Because getting his hopes up and then having them crushed? That just really fucking hurt. No, thank you very much, not interested in experiencing that again.

“Actually, have you seen Eddie today by any chance? Can’t fucking find him anywhere.” Richie asked, hoping to change the topic at least a tiny bit.

Adrian nodded, pointing towards one of the big buildings where some of their seminars were held. “Yeah, I actually ran into him on my way from class. Asked him what class he had and apparently he was on his way to Spanish?”

Richie frowned in confusion. “You sure? Eddie doesn’t have Spanish this semester.” Adrian shrugged. “I’m pretty sure he said Spanish. He also mentioned something about having to talk to Bev?”

Oh. Fuck. Okay, so that was really bad. So Eddie decided to still try and get some information about the time loop from Beverly. Awesome, just fucking great. Because Richie was sure that the moment Beverly mentions anything about their argument Eddie will just straight up start hating him forever.

And Richie would deserve that for being a lying piece of shit friend, he knew that. But he also knew losing Eddie would destroy him. He couldn’t lose him. Call him selfish if you want.

Adrian noticed Richie’s panicked expression, so he softly grabbed Richie’s arm, getting back his attention. “You sure you’re okay, Richie? You know you can tell me anything, right? I could try to help?”

And fuck, Richie really wanted to tell him everything, so that he wouldn’t have to deal with all of this alone, because being stuck in his own head felt suffocating. But he knew he couldn’t. He didn’t have the time and also knew Adrian would tell him to just be honest about it all and tell Eddie. And Richie didn’t want to think about that. He knew it was the best solution to everything but he was a fucking coward, okay? He might had learned to face and accept his own feelings, but being honest about them and expressing them to others - especially when 'others' meant Eddie? Nope, there was no way he’d ever have enough courage to do that. He couldn’t handle more rejection from the people he loved.

Richie felt sick about how angsty he was feeling at the moment, so he just shrugged off Adrian’s comforting hand and took a step back.

“I think I’m gonna go? I uh- have some school stuff to do. See you later?”

A look of disappointment and sadness crossed Adrian’s face as he nodded, not trying to push Richie and make him feel uncomfortable.

“Okay, but you know you can just come over or call me, right? I really wanna be here for you, Richie.” Adrian tried again, feeling hopeless because he wanted to help his friend.

Richie nodded, a small smile appearing on his face for a second before he shot a quick peace sign at Adrian, then swiftly turned around and headed towards the building where Eddie was supposed to be.

Walking inside the class in the middle of the seminar was one of the most embarrassing things Richie had to do, especially once the professor asked Richie for an apology for being late in fucking Spanish. Richie had French every semester, therefore he had no idea what to do in order to not get immediately kicked out, so he just tried to smile in the most apologetic way he could and quickly walk over to the back of the classroom. He managed to catch Beverly giving him a weird look on the way, ignoring it and sitting down next to Eddie who was frowning at him, even though Richie managed to notice the small smirk that tugged at his lips. Of course Eddie would find this whole thing amusing.

Thankfully the professor let it all go with an eye-roll, going back to explaining some vocabulary in his presentation to the rest of the students in the class.

“How the fuck did you find me, you big idiot?” Eddie whispered, full on smiling at that point. Richie smiled back, finding it impossible to keep a straight face when Eddie was looking at him like _that_.

“Adrian told me.”

Eddie’s smile faltered for just a quick second, but Richie noticed. Huh, weird.

“By the way, thanks for letting me know that our plans for today were cancelled, Eds. Totally didn’t spend hours looking for you around campus.” Richie replied, no anger behind his words, though. He understood where Eddie was coming from. He just wanted some answers to solve this mess.

Eddie blushed, ducking his head down so that Richie wouldn’t notice. “Yeah, sorry about that. I was about to text you, I promise.”

Richie shrugged, playfully leaning into Eddie. “No problemo, Eduardo. Can’t be mad at you when you’re this cute, cute, cute!”

Eddie pushed Richie away from him, trying his hardest to frown but failing big time and ending up grinning instead. “You’re so fucking annoying, Richie, oh my god.”

Richie grinned too, ruffling Eddie’s hair messily. “You love it.”

And yeah, Eddie did love it. But he would never admit that to Richie. Even though he had a suspicion that Richie was very much aware of that. Eddie could tell by the smile Richie always gave him, the look in his eyes that Eddie hoped wasn’t just his brain’s imagination deciding to pull of a cruel joke on him, the way his cheeks tinted red and his pupils went a bit wider when Eddie called him stupid in a way that sounded way too affectionate. Sometimes, in these moments, Eddie almost felt brave enough to push it further a bit more, to test the waters and say something daring that would make it clear to Richie how he felt about him, what he wished he’d be brave enough to do.

But they were in a room full of other people, so instead Eddie changed the topic. “I wanna talk to Beverly after this class ends. Ask her about the time loop and stuff.”

Richie nodded, trying not to seem too panicked about that. “I think we should just go, Eds. She probably won’t have any answers.”

Eddie frowned. Okay, bad decision to say that. Good job, Richie. Fucking idiot.

“Why the fuck do you keep saying that? Have you actually talked to her? No, you didn’t. So let me ask her, so that we can move on and look for answers somewhere else, okay?”

Richie was about to object to that, when the professor, now seemingly angry ordered them to get out of his class, because if they weren’t there to learn then they shouldn’t be there at all. And okay, yeah, that kind of solved the situation for Richie.

Richie let out a breath of relief, taking Eddie by the arm carefully and dragging him out of the class, eliciting another confused look from Beverly when they passed her on their way out.

When they were finally out of the building Eddie smacked Richie into his arm.

“What the fuck? Why would you get us kicked out?!”

“Hey! You were the one talking too loudly!”

Eddie rubbed his eyes using his hands, feeling frustrated and sighing loudly.

“Okay, well. What the fuck do we do now? Since we can’t talk to Bev anymore.”

Richie tried to ease the situation, wrapping an arm around Eddie’s shoulders and walking with him towards his dorm room.

“We could just, I don’t know, go on with our day like we initially planned?” Richie suggested, maybe sounding a bit more sarcastic than he’d like.

“Ugh, I already told you I was sorry for ditching you like that, Rich!” Eddie groaned, letting Richie decide where they were going, since he liked the way his arm was wrapped around his shoulders and held him close. So what if he liked having Richie’s attention like this? Sue him.

“Wanna make it up to me, Spaghetti?” Richie winked. And okay, Eddie’s thoughts now went in a completely unnecessary direction that made him blush real hard. Why did Richie have to wink on top of it all? Ugh.

Eddie groaned in annoyance and shook Richie’s arm from his shoulders, frowning at him. Then he pushed all those dangerous and mostly embarrassing thoughts away forcefully to the back of his head, deciding to go with the safe option here.

“If this is your way of making me play fucking Jenga with you again against my will after the last disaster of a game, then you should know better than that, asshole.”

Richie burst out laughing at Eddie’s words, laughing so hard he had to stop walking, bending over in laughter. Eddie rolled his eyes.

“Yes, ha fucking ha, Richie. Very funny.”

Richie raised a hand up in surrender, still laughing. Eddie was on the edge of laughing too at this point, laughing along with Richie was always the best feeling.

“Rich, come on. It wasn’t that funny.”

Richie shook his head, standing up properly again and wiping away tears from his eyes.

“Ah, that was just priceless, Eds. How the fuck did you even come up with that?! We played Jenga ages ago.”

Eddie rolled his eyes again, his face bright red, as he grabbed Richie’s arm and dragged him the rest of the remaining distance to his own dorm room that he shared with Bill, who was most likely still either in his classes or at the library.

Richie fell face down onto Eddie’s neatly made up bed, earning a disapproving sound from Eddie who just closed the door behind him and was in the process of untying his shoelaces, so he could easily kick off his sneakers and lie down next to Richie.

“You can’t just jump on my bed face first like this every time you come over! You’re gonna break your glasses one day, asshole.”

Richie chuckled, rolling onto his back and giving Eddie an amused grin instead of a reply, earning a soft smack into his shoulder from Eddie. Richie loved teasing him like this, it felt natural, sometimes he didn’t even have to try because Eddie always managed to find something to complain about. Richie didn’t mind though, he could see the smile Eddie was fighting off whenever he complained. And Richie wasn’t dumb, he knew this was their way of getting the other’s attention without being too obvious about it, without having to admit anything more personal.

“Okay, so… What are we gonna do now?” Eddie asked after a minute of comfortable silence, staring at the boring ceiling, his legs swinging slowly from the edge of the bed. Richie rolled onto his side, propping his head on his arm and staring down at Eddie.

“Whatever _you_ wanna do, Spaghetti.”

Eddie locked eyes with him, a small blush creeping onto his cheeks and nose, raising both of his eyebrows. “Weren’t you supposed to have a plan for today, Mr. Let’s-ignore-the-time-loop-and-do-stupid-shit-together-instead?”

Richie laughed and fell onto his back again, arms folded under his head. “I _had_ a plan, but we’d need the entire day for that. Fuck it, wanna restart?”

“What the fuck do you mean by ' _restart_ '? So now every damn time something goes wrong you’re just gonna fall asleep and start all over again?” Eddie asked, bewildered.

Richie shrugged, thinking it over but not seeing any problem with it. “Yup, why the fuck not? You got any better idea, Eds?”

“I don’t know - literally anything else? We could go watch a movie or something.”

Richie took Eddie’s pillow in one quick motion and put it over his face, groaning into it in frustration, even though the groaning came out all muffled because of the pillow and it ended up looking way more funny than Richie probably intended; at least in Eddie’s opinion who was currently trying his hardest not to burst out laughing.

“I’m too tired to do anything, Eds.” Richie mumbled, his face still pressed into the pillow.

Eddie rolled his eyes, a fond smile on his face as he took the pillow from Richie, removing it from his face. “But you’re always tired, asshole. Besides, I really wanna go see a movie with you.”

Yup, that was about right when it came to Richie’s luck. Of course he’d get stuck in a time loop after having a sleepless night, being forced to start every new loop tired. If this was the universe’s way of telling Richie to fix his sleep schedule, then he had to admit it was lowkey working.

Richie’s eyes locked with Eddie’s in some sort of confusion at his latest request.

“You _actually_ wanna go out and watch a movie? With _me_?”

Eddie rolled his eyes for the millionth time that day, still smiling and nodding, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Yes? Why the fuck wouldn’t I wanna watch a movie with you?”

Richie sat up and shrugged, staring down at Eddie with wide eyes. “Whenever we went with the others, you’d end up ranting about how much you hate going to the cinema with me, because I make too many jokes during the film and chew too loudly or whatever.” Richie explained, watching Eddie intently, waiting for his reaction.

Eddie’s face scrunched up in confusion, his brain working really hard to figure all this out, before his eyes widened and he sat up, glancing at Richie in confusion.

“Wait, fuck, hold on. You _actually_ thought I was being serious?”

Now it was Richie’s turn to look all confused, because yeah, he actually _did_ think that.

Richie’s silence was enough of an answer for Eddie. And yeah, Eddie felt like the worst friend for this. He knew it was only a stupid misunderstanding, but fuck, the glint of hurt in Richie’s eyes was killing him.

As if on instinct, without even thinking about it, Eddie placed his hand onto Richie’s, squeezing his fingers softly. “Holy shit, Richie, I’m so sorry it seemed like that. I really didn’t mean it. I love when you make stupid jokes during the movie, I thought you knew that.” Eddie insisted, blushing. He didn’t want to admit how he felt about Richie’s jokes, how much he loved them and how they always made him smile, even though he tried to hide it most of the time. But this was a serious situation, and if expressing his feelings even a tiny bit meant Richie wouldn’t feel sad and hurt, then it was absolutely worth the embarrassment and the inevitably incoming jokes from Richie.

And he was right. Richie was already grinning, happiness reflecting in his eyes again and pushing the hurt away.

“So you love my jokes, huh?” Richie asked, the teasing undertone clear in his voice as he waggled his eyebrows. Eddie blushed harder, if that was even possible at this point, taking the pillow and being the one to hide his face behind it this time around.

“Shut up.” He mumbled into it, but Richie was laughing already, pulling the pillow from Eddie’s grasp and smiling at him widely.

“Oh, come on, Spaghetti! Nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s not your fault that I’m irresistible.”

Eddie groaned, his cheeks now as red as a tomato. How fucking embarrassing.

“Fuck off. I didn’t say that.” Eddie protested, but even he could hear the slight teasing in his voice. Fuck, why was it so hard for him to keep his composure around Richie. Well… Eddie knew the answer to that, but ignoring it was easier than facing it.

Doing his best to ignore Richie’s intense eyes on him, knowing the atmosphere around them was uncomfortably mixed with some sort of tension, the good kind, though, Eddie tried to pull his pillow back from Richie’s firm grip, so that he could hide his face again. Instead he managed to pull extra hard when Richie wasn’t expecting it which resulted in Richie losing his balance and falling on top of Eddie, pushing him into the mattress with his weight.

“What the fu— Richie!” Eddie tried pushing him away, but not hard enough for Richie to actually move from where he was hovering over him, hands pushing into the mattress on each side of his head, keeping him in place.

Eddie tried to not focus on all the thoughts that were all over the place in his head, all related to the fact about how much he actually liked being under Richie like this. And Eddie really didn’t want to think about that at this specific moment.

But Richie just stared at him, a slight blush dusting his cheeks and the tips of his ears, some specific type of expression on his face that Eddie couldn’t quite explain and it drove him crazy, because that look Richie was giving him was doing things to him.

Richie looked so beautiful like this and Eddie’s heart ached.

“I really wanna kiss you right now, Eds.” Richie said out of nowhere, violently pulling Eddie away from his thoughts and into the present.

His eyes widened, his mouth agape but unable to say a word. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Eddie was on the edge of just grabbing Richie by his t-shirt and pulling him down into a kiss. He wanted to do that so badly, his head spinning at just the thought, the butterflies in his stomach going wild.

But he wasn’t expecting Richie to admit anything like _that_ , so he naturally panicked, deciding to go with the dumbest option - speaking.

“Good one, Trashmouth.” He replied, trying to laugh but the sound that came out of his mouth sounded forced. And _of course_. Of course he would ruin the moment he kept waiting for almost his whole fucking life like this.

Richie, not expecting such a turn of events, quickly tried to come up with a joke to deflect the awkwardness of the whole situation, climbing off of Eddie clumsily.

Eddie just wanted to disappear, stop existing and escape this whole situation that he himself managed to fuck up big time.

“Anyway, uh… We could just watch a movie here?” Richie suggested, trying to change the topic as quickly as possible. Eddie nodded in agreement, just wanting Richie to put on some shitty comedy, so that they could forget about this whole mess of a situation and move the fuck on from it.

Half an hour later they were both comfortably snuggled next to each other on Eddie’s bed, watching some low-budget comedy Richie picked on Netflix, both laughing at the stupidity of the jokes, the awkward moment they shared earlier already in the past.

Eddie pulled the warm blanket he shared with Richie closer to his chin, his eyes slowly closing and all thoughts clearing from his mind as he could feel sleep overcome him.

“Hey, Eds?” Richie whispered, unsure whether Eddie was already asleep next to him, not wanting to wake him up.

Eddie made a small annoyed sound and turned his head towards Richie, opening his eyes slowly against his brain’s protests. He just wanted to sleep, so what?

“I forgot to ask earlier, but how exactly did you restart the loop the last time? I know I did it by falling asleep.” Richie asked curiously.

The question sobered Eddie up pretty quickly, so he pushed himself up on the bed a bit, his head comfortably resting against Richie’s shoulder.

“Oh yeah, about that. I don’t know, I just suddenly felt extremely tired and before I even managed to get into bed I think I just passed out?”

Richie frowned. “So you’re saying the time loop made you fall asleep at the same time too? Wow, that’s lowkey fucked up, huh? What if you were outside with someone or something and suddenly you’d just fall asleep.” Richie chuckled at the thought, earning a soft slap on his arm from Eddie, which made him start laughing full on.

“Shut up, dickhead. That isn’t funny!” Eddie protested, his lips curling into a small smile nevertheless.

Richie was uncharacteristically quiet for a moment, lost in thought. “Wait, I think we should just try and figure this out.”

“What do you mean?” Eddie asked, pausing the TV, so that it wouldn’t distract them, the conversation getting his attention fully, sparking his interest.

“Like the general rules of this time loop thingy.”

Eddie laughed. “Time loop _thingy_?”

“Yes, time loop _thingy_.” Richie chuckled.

“Okay, sure, why not? We’re most likely gonna be stuck in this mess for some time, so we might as well figure it out at least a bit. What kind of rules exactly, though?”

“Well, we now know that if one of us falls asleep the other person basically drops dead immediately.”

“I didn’t fucking drop dead!” Eddie protested. “I just fell asleep super quickly.”

Richie grinned. “That’s basically the same thing, Eds.”

Eddie was about to protest some more but Richie continued. “So the most important question is; What happens if we die?”

Eddie frowned, confused. “The fuck you mean by that?”

“I meant, what would happen if we just managed to die during the day.”

“That’s so stupid, Rich. How exactly would we even manage to die in the span of one day?!”

Richie knew that was a fair point. The chances of them somehow ending up dying during the day were fucking nonexistent as far as he was concerned. Even he knew that. Yeah, okay, maybe bringing it up as a serious question was stupid.

“Okay, yeah, whatever.”

Eddie smiled, nudging Richie with his elbow. “What was that?”

Richie rolled his eyes, smiling too now. “You were right, Eds. Happy now?”

Eddie nodded contently, satisfied with Richie’s reply, snuggling back into Richie’s side and unpausing the TV. They went back to watching the movie, occasionally chuckling at some jokes, feeling content in each other’s arms and waiting - waiting to eventually, _inevitably_ , fall asleep.

“Eddie?”

Eddie locked eyes with his own reflection, seeing himself standing in his own room in front of his closet, the mirror glued to one of the closet doors.

Right. He was back at the start.

“A-are you e-even li-listening, Eddie?” Bill asked again, quickly throwing some last necessary items into his backpack; Eddie caught a glimpse of a laptop charger, some notebooks and pencils.

Eddie nodded quickly, giving Bill a small smile.

“Wanna m-meet u-up for l-lunch?” Bill suggested, zipping up his backpack and then swinging it over his shoulder.

“Um, actually… I’m kinda already spending the whole day with Richie today. Sorry, Bill.”

Bill waved Eddie’s apology away, smiling. “R-rain check t-then?”

Eddie nodded in agreement, actually really wanting to hang out with Bill soon, because it’d been too long since just the two of them hung out together.

Bill happily waved a quick goodbye, said something about the library and being late, before running out the door. Eddie chuckled, sitting down onto his bed and taking out his phone, planning to call Richie so they could choose a place for them to meet up.

He was really looking forward to spending the whole full day with Richie, just going on a long drive or some trip into nature or the city or something. He didn’t have a preference when it came to the place, as long as he was with Richie, they could be at the most boring place in the world and he’d still be happy and entertained.

Suddenly, Eddie screamed in pain, his whole body feeling as if a truck just hit him at the highest possible speed. He fell from his bed onto the hard wooden floor, a painful shock bolting through his entire body and almost paralyzing him. Eddie bit on his hand, trying to suppress another painful scream. He started hyperventilating, the pain so unbearable that he wished to faint, just so he escape it.

Was he in the middle of a sudden panic attack? What he actually fucking dying?! Eddie had no idea what was happening.

He tried reaching for his phone to call Richie or an ambulance, anyone who could help, but the second he moved his arm another wave of pain engulfed him, making him bite down hard into the side of his hand, the metal taste of blood on his tongue making him feel sick.

The worst part, though, of whatever the fuck was happening to him now, was the sudden realization that the pain wasn’t getting any less intense; on the contrary, it was getting worse with every breath he took.

With another pained cry, Eddie grabbed his phone and dialed Richie’s number, lying down onto the cold floor of his room. He didn’t know what he prayed for more; the pain going away and somehow miraculously surviving but having to hold onto the memory of a pain this severe forever, or dying and never having to experience anything like this again, not even in his mind through his memories.

The sudden beeping of his phone pulled Eddie out of his nonsensical thoughts, the pain getting so unbearable he felt tears streaming down his face. He looked at his phone, eyes wide. Richie wasn’t picking up. He wasn’t fucking picking up his phone.

Eddie threw the phone against the wall, full on sobbing at this point, his chest tightening so badly he found it hard to breathe with each passing second.

Fuck, not like this! He didn’t want to die in pain and alone. Not after surviving Derry. Not before he got to tell Richie how he felt. It wasn’t fair.

But Eddie almost couldn’t feel any sadness, couldn’t feel anything other than the pain that was eating him alive. So he forced his eyes closed, hopelessly crying and wishing he would die soon, so he didn’t have to feel anything anymore.

“Eddie?”

“A-are you e-even li-listening, Eddie?”

Bill.

Eddie was sure that was Bill’s voice. Wait.

“E-Eddie, are y-you ok-okay?” Bill asked again softly, walking over to him and placing a hand on his shoulder.

Eddie blinked his eyes open in sudden shock, seeing his own reflection in the mirror placed in front of him again. Holy fuck.

“Am I— am I dead, Bill?” Eddie asked without even thinking first, his voice so quiet he could barely hear it himself.

Bill frowned, eyebrows knitted together in both confusion and worry.

“S-should I c-call so-someone for h-help?” Bill’s grip on Eddie’s shoulder tightened, holding on to him in case he ended up fainting.

Eddie didn’t know what to think. He could clearly remember all the pain, he could still faintly hear his own cries, but now? He felt normal. As if nothing ever happened. And he was clearly back at the beginning of the time loop.

Not to worry Bill any more, Eddie forced himself to smile, nodding.

“I’m okay, everything’s okay. Sorry for scaring you like that, Bill. I just… Just remembered a weird dream I had last night.” Eddie lied, forcing a grin to make it even more believable.

Bill looked at him in worry for another long second, before he smiled back and dropped his hand from Eddie’s shoulder. “O-okay, but l-let me k-know if any-anything ha-happens, yeah?” Bill added, just to make sure his friend was okay, before walking over to his backpack to finish packing it.

Eddie felt frustrated to the point of crying. He was scared, for fuck’s sake. He hadn’t been this scared ever since he had to fight that fucking clown. He was about to start panicking again when his phone beeped, a new message from Richie appearing on the bright screen.

**From:** Richard:)

‘omw, be @ ur place in 5’

Okay, alright, that was good. The thought of Richie coming over and Eddie not being alone, being able to talk about it with someone who understood, calmed him down. A lot. Okay, deep breaths, Eddie. Deep fucking breaths.

Eddie looked around the room, realizing that Bill already left without him even noticing.

He sat down onto his bed, nervously bouncing his leg and staring at the small watch on his wrist. Five minutes. He could do that, right?

Eddie was just about to get up and start pacing around the room, when someone knocked on the door. Richie.

Eddie basically ran to the door, opening it quickly and revealing a smiling Richie behind it. “Eds! You won’t believe what I just found out!” He announced enthusiastically, walking inside the room, Eddie closing the door behind him and turning to face him.

Richie looked so excited, Eddie hated to kill the mood.

Richie was about to continue and explain what he was so happy about, when he noticed Eddie’s distressed expression and trembling hands. His smile dropped immediately, his eyes worried as he carefully took a step closer towards Eddie and took his hand into his own protectively.

“Eddie? Is everything okay? Did something happen?”

Eddie wanted to explain and describe everything, he really wanted to, but it was just too much. This whole time loop thing was stressing him out and he just wanted one fucking peaceful day. He deserved it.

So instead of saying anything, Eddie wrapped his arms around Richie’s waist, face resting against his chest, and started crying. Richie was fast to react, pulling Eddie closer and wrapping his arms around his shoulders, caressing his back soothingly and resting his chin on the top of Eddie’s head.

“Hey, Eddie. Please, tell me what’s wrong. I want to help.” Richie mumbled into Eddie’s hair, feeling like he might cry himself.

After a long minute, Eddie took a deep breath and pulled away from Richie’s embrace, wiping his eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie.

“Hey, let’s sit.” Richie suggested in such a soft voice laced with so much care and love that Eddie wanted to start crying all over again.

He sat down onto his bed, Richie sitting next to him, taking his hand into his own again to comfort him.

“I thought I died.” Eddie explained after a few seconds, looking at the way Richie’s fingers were laced with his own slightly shaking ones.

Richie was uncharacteristically quiet, so Eddie glanced up curiously, locking eyes with him. Richie looked pale, paler than usual for sure, as if he he might either faint or throw up any second.

“Richie?” Eddie asked, squeezing his hand softly.

Richie shook his head, as if he didn’t want to hear anything, his eyes filling with tears. No. No, no, no. Fuck. Richie didn’t intend for this to happen.

“I’m so fucking sorry, Eds. I didn’t know.”

Eddie furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “Didn’t know what?”

But Richie just shook his head again in denial. He really did think he’d be the _only_ one who could potentially feel the pain, nevertheless he still chose a really tall building just in case, so that it would be super quick and painless. How was he supposed to know that they were connected to this extent when it came to restarting the loop?! He thought Eddie would just immediately wake up back at the start, not feel the pain of what it is like to jump off a fucking building before eventually dying from wounds he didn’t even have. Fuck. Richie wanted nothing more than to take it all back. He’d do anything, give up anything, just to take it all back forever.

“It’s my fault. It’s all my fucking fault, Eds.”

Oh. Eddie managed to connect the dots immediately, shaking his head in disbelief. “Do not fucking tell me you decided to kill yourself _just_ to see what would happen, Rich. I swear to fucking God if—“

“I didn’t know you’d feel it!”

“How could you _not_ know?! We literally talked about it a few minutes before you did it!”

Richie sighed, rubbing his face with his hands, cheeks already stained with tears.

“I didn’t know you’d feel the pain, I swear. I thought you’d just wake up at the start again.”

Eddie didn’t know what to think at that point. Sure, he was mad as hell at Richie for being so fucking dumb he’d risk his own life just to prove he was right. What if he didn’t wake up again? What if he just ended up being dead forever, leaving Eddie in the time loop by himself. That thought alone made Eddie feel so violently upset that he had to get up from the bed and start pacing around the room. He was mad at Richie for being so unbelievably stupid, but he couldn’t exactly hold it all against him. Richie didn’t know what would happen to Eddie, he didn’t know Eddie would be the one in pain.

Richie was following Eddie with his eyes, looking so upset and desperate and hopeless that Eddie just wanted to wrap his arms around his body and hug him for the rest of his life.

“Eds. Eddie, please talk to me.” Richie begged, rubbing at his eyes again with the hem of his t-shirt, trying to get rid of the spilled tears.

Eddie stopped pacing around the room, arms crossed on his chest. “You’re such a fucking idiot, Richie. I can’t believe you thought that was a good idea. Fuck.” Eddie tried to sound more angry, he really did, but he couldn’t be. He wasn’t angry. He was just tired and stressed and wanted nothing more than to get over all of this and be able to just hug Richie again and have a normal fucking life.

“Did you— What even happened?” Eddie asked.

“I decided to try it, to figure out what would happen if I just died in the loop. So I chose the tallest building here, so that I’d die the second I uh… you know,” Richie paused, sighing. “And then I jumped from the roof. I don’t really remember it, though. I basically died in a second.” Richie explained, looking at Eddie, waiting for his reaction hopelessly.

“Then why the fuck was I dying for so long in here?!” Eddie felt tricked, betrayed by the whole fucking time loop thing or the universe or whatever created all this bullshit. That was so unfair.

Richie shrugged, trying to make sense of it. “I guess it always takes a bit longer for the other person to follow the first one back to the start. It would make sense if that’s the case.”

And yeah, that actually made sense to Eddie. But it was still very fucking unfair.

“I’m truly so sorry, Eddie. I promise I really didn’t know. I would never do it if I knew.” Richie apologized again.

“I know. Just… Please don’t do anything this stupid ever again, okay? Fuck, you could have died, Richie.” Eddie replied, his voice trembling slightly, tears welling up in his eyes. He didn’t want to lose Richie. Never. And judging by the realization reflecting on Richie’s face, Richie understood that.

After a few more minutes of talking it all out, Richie and Eddie ended up snuggled together on Eddie’s bed under a big blanket, talking about everything and nothing at the same time, feeling comfortable in each other’s presence. It was what they needed, what made them believe that there was still some sort of hope, it helped them feel sane in a situation like this one. They both knew they could overcome anything as long as they were together.

Obviously they were also aware that they’d have to talk a bit more about some things that happened, that they’d also have to find and figure out more information about the time loop in order to escape from it. But right now in this moment they just wanted to be as close as possible to each other and let the world around them disappear and not matter for a bit.

For now it was just the two of them in their own world. And it was enough.


End file.
